• Woman is tired of her marriage or boyfriend, or is having an affair and wants man gone, but doesn't want to lose the kids, the house, the car, the bank account, credit cards, etc. that she enjoys as a result of the marriage or shacking up.

• She talks with an attorney, shelter worker, victim's advocate, or similar parasite, who advise her to take out a restraining order of file DV charges against her husband or boyfriend. They also tell her what to say, e.g., she is in "fear for her life," he is a "trained killer' due to his military service, he abuses her, she is suffering emotional harm, etc. Since perjury and subornation of perjury are virtually never punished, any lies will do and hearsay is admissible.

• Man is then arrested or thrown out of his home, preferably without hearing or notice, never to return.

• Since, by decree, he is branded as dangerous and violent, it is in "the best interests of his children" that he he have no, or very limited contact and visitation with them. He certainly must not have primary custody of them.

• Man naively thinks he has some rights and civil liberties and that if he tells the truth the judge will listen and things will get straightened out. Wrong again.

• His path will fork here. Most men will believe the lies the DA tells them about DV, or the restraining order violation, being simply a misdemeanor and take a plea bargain. Wrong again, and he surrenders all rights to appeal, to civil liberties, to professional licenses, security clearances, to even rent an apartment. The outcome is the same if he takes a bench trial before a judge, which is simply a long, slow way of pleading guilty.

• A few will take the very wise course of pleading not guilty and demanding a jury trial. While this almost guarantees charges against him will eventually be dropped or he will be acquitted, he is going to have to spend a lot of money on an attorney. And finding a competent attorney is searching for a needle in a haystack. His hiring an attorney escalates the conflict and she is likely to get free legal assistance, particularly if criminal charges are brought against him. Nothing excites and enriches the "legal" profession more than two feuding attorneys.

• He almost certainly loses his job (~80% chance) due to the DV conviction, all the time he has to spend in court, mental strain (PTSD is a given), loss of security clearance, loss of license, etc.

• Any assets either he or she have probably go to legal fees or survival. He lives in his car or with relatives, or becomes homeless. He can't pay child support because he is unemployed but that doesn't stop the court from "imputing" an income based on what the judge thinks he should be earning. When he can't pay he is placed in debtor's prison as a "deadbeat dad." Many times his only way out is suicide.

• After taking everything she can from him, she shacks up with other men, who may really be abusive either to her or any children she has. In the meantime any medical or mental problems she has go untreated as, obviously, everything is the fault of her ex and she is fine.

• The kids want Dad and become rebellious. She can't handle them and child abuse or neglect begins because there isn't any money. "Child Protective Service (CPS)" becomes involved. Of course no redfem CPS agent in her left mind would ever consider letting Dad take the kids. So, all too often, the kids end up in foster care, often a recipe for even more abuse and neglect. Don't look for many future scientists and engineers to emerge from kids who've been through this.

• With 50% of all marriages ending in divorce, the only defense an intelligent man currently has is to not marry or sire any children.

Last Update: 5 January 2008